The Dawn of Smell-O-Vision

In the animal kingdom, a sense of smell is a useful tool. We can tell whether our food is fresh, our clothes are clean… and we might even choose a mate by their scent. Soon, marketers may try to attract your nose to their products. But like too much noise, too many smells may be a turn-off. Great Lakes Radio Consortium commentator Tom Dunkel doesn’t mind that he’ll miss out on this new kind of pollution:

Transcript

In the animal kingdom, a sense of smell is a useful tool. We can tell whether our food is fresh, our clothes are clean… and we might even choose a mate by their scent. Soon, marketers may try to attract your nose to their products. But like too much noise, too many smells may be a turn-off. Great Lakes Radio Consortium commentator Tom Dunkel doesn’t mind that he’ll miss out on this new kind of pollution.


The nose knows more than we think it does. Studies have shown humans secrete the same chemical scents called “pheromones” that trigger things like aggression and mating in the animal kingdom. What does that mean? Well, it means that by mixing the smells of lavender and pumpkin pie, researchers in Chicago were able to sexually arouse a test group of men… a test group of, apparently, very lonely, embarrassed men. Its private industry’s job is to try and cash in on scientific discoveries. Which explains why a patent has been issued for a little device that attaches to a TV, computer, or stereo. The sole purpose of this little gizmo is to generate odors that enhance what we see and hear on our TVs, computers, and stereos. Yes…. It’s the Dawn of Smell-o-Vision! And it’s only a matter of time until it produces a new, annoying form of environmental pollution.


Someday soon grocers will be spritzing supermarket aisles with chocolate-based fumes…. fumes that fill shoppers with a heroin-like craving for Coco Puffs. Airline industry scientists will discover that the combined smell of fruitcake and varnish make passengers actually want to stand in line for hours at ticket counters. We’ll be begging for flight delays. Some future presidential candidate will get catapulted into office by winning the scratch-n’-sniff-campaign-button vote.


Fortunately, I’m going to miss out on this brave, new, environmentally manipulated world. I’m going to miss out because I’m one of about 3 million Americans who have no sense of smell. People like you…. normal people…. enjoy a symphony of 10,000 different odors. My world of smell is a one-note song: ammonia. Eye-watering, sinus-scorching ammonia…the nasal equivalent of having ears that can only hear blood-curdling screams. As handicaps go, I admit I have a minor one. Ragged men don’t stand on street corners mumbling, “Hey, buddy, can you spare a dollar for a guy who’s never smelled fresh-baked bread?” But being born without a sense of smell has very practical, very anxiety producing implications. I have left chicken pot pies baking in the oven all night long…. cooked them no, incinerated them – until a neighbor stopped by to ask if my kitchen was on fire. Likewise, I can’t tell if I’ve worn a suit two times or 20 times. Imagine sitting in a business meeting, brimming over with earth-shattering, big ideas…but convinced nobody will listen to those Big Ideas because you smell like a high school gym locker.


I long ago accepted the fact that my nose can’t distinguish a rose from road kill. But after all these years – not being able to smell has suddenly developed a bright side: No company is going to manipulate my environment. I am totally immune to Smell-o-Vision. Better yet: No matter what those wacky, test-group scientists do, I will never, ever, get sexually aroused by a piece of pumpkin pie.

State to Force Mercury Reductions?

Mercury emissions from more than 150 coal-burning power plants across the Great Lakes are coming under greater scrutiny this summer. Several states are considering ways to reduce those emissions. Wisconsin could become the first state in the nation to issue rules requiring large mercury reductions. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Chuck Quirmbach has the story:

Kids Pluck Lessons From Business

For years, people have grappled with the age-old question: Which
came first, the chicken or the egg? Of course, there’s no definitive
answer. But as the Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Wendy Nelson
reports, at one elementary school, the chickens always come first:

Obsolete Computers Piling Up

The growth of computer technology makes our lives easier in
many ways. But there’s one big drawback: as the technology improves,
you have to update your system frequently. Now some environmentalists
are becoming concerned about the pollution caused by discarded
computers. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Wendy Nelson reports:

Golf Craze Sweeps the Region

Business is booming for Michigan’s golf industry. According to the
National Federation of Golf, Michigan now exceeds both California and
Florida for most public golf courses per capita. Even universities are
cashing in on the golf craze by converting parts of their campuses into
golf courses. But now one university, in a wealthy Detroit suburb, is
encountering opposition from environmentalists as they try build a
course on their land. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Marisa Helms
reports:

Global Worming

Remember when you were a kid, how you’d spend hours poking around,
looking for creepy crawly things? If one woman has her way, a lot more
of us will rediscover that joy…And as adults, also appreciate some
practical benefits. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Wendy Nelson
explains:

Urban Trapping

As human populations grow and sprawl out from cities, the number of
human/animal conflicts increases. But it’s creating a healthy demand
for a growing industry. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Wendy Nelson
reports:

The Stone Business Rocks

You might gather a few stones as you walk along the beach, or buy some
at the hardware store to use in landscaping. But if you want to get a
good idea of the wide variety of stones, you might make a visit to the
Stone Zone. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Wendy Nelson reports:

Worm Dispensing Machines?

When vending machines were first introduced, they mostly dispensed
coffee, soft drinks, and cellophane-wrapped sandwiches. But today, some
vending machines are offering up a very different kind of grub; they
dispense fishing bait. It’s a growing trend in vending. There are now
about two-thousand bait machines across the country, with the largest
concentration in Michigan, Ohio, and New York. The Great Lakes Radio
Consortium’s Wendy Nelson reports:

Lice Exterminators Pluck Profits

Over the past several years, lice outbreaks have become more frequent
and more severe. Some scientists believe it’s because a new strain of
lice have developed resistance to both over-the-counter and prescription
lice treatments. But as researchers scratch their heads and wonder what
to do to control these "super lice", some new businesses are jumping in
with an answer. The Great Lakes Radio Consortium’s Wendy Nelson
reports: